Any time I spent outside was on the water, where it was cool enough to keep away from mosquitos. I grew up with white-passing privilege. I also grew up with a lot of homophobia and outright hatred for queer and trans people. I knew I didn’t belong, even though I didn’t quite understand why I felt that way. I knew I wanted to be somewhere else, but I didn’t know where that somewhere else was.

I’ve learned many things about building an intentional community on my climbing journey... What it feels like to start to stand up for yourself and other people and try to change things that are unfair, unjust, and exclusive. What it feels like when friends stand up and show up for you, risking social ostracism and negativity. What it really means to be a good climbing partner. What it feels like when other people succeed at things that you taught them. What it feels like to witness representation. What it feels like to be seen and heard and understood. What it feels like to finally belong...

Before this course, I spent two weekends in a class where I kept getting misgendered, and it was annoying but just something that happens almost every day. Being in a class taught by someone who I knew understood me, it felt so easy to focus just on the learning.

My intention in taking the SPI course was, and still is, to help people become self-sufficient climbers. Anyone who feels like they haven’t been able to find mentors or a way into their climbing communities, as I did and still do: that’s who I want to teach and help make climbing more accessible to. I am still figuring out what the next step is, but I feel like I have a lot more tools for the road ahead.

It’s hard to see yourself doing an activity if there isn’t good representation in that specific environment or if you don’t have the tools to be out there safely. Especially with the SPI course, I think it can help bring down some of the barriers that exist to going outdoors and climbing for BIPOC, queer, and women climbers. I’m excited to pass on this knowledge to other climbers that might not have had the opportunity to find a mentor in their community.

Reflecting back on the weekend, I think most of the participants would agree with me that it was easier to learn being surrounded by other queer folks. I’ve had so many people in my own group say that they wouldn’t have gone to certain areas before had it not been in a queer or POC-specific space because they felt much safer in a group. Historically there is a lot of violence that has existed in the outdoors, especially for Black and Indigenous folks, so I think creating these spaces for people to learn and pass on knowledge is extremely important.

Since coming out publicly in 2018, I receive messages each week from people all over the world who thought they were alone until they found me. This needs to change. We need more queer leaders at every level of climbing─guides, industry, athletes, etc. We need to be visible to help create affinity spaces for those who are afraid to participate and show them that they belong. Right now, there aren't enough queer guides, so I want to partner with guide services to offer queer programming and help create sustainable programs so they can continue after I leave.

We need the outdoor industry, guide services, and guides to show their commitment to change by doing more to welcome folks from underrepresented communities into our ranks: supporting affinity space programming by working with guides and leaders from those communities to create these programs; hiring more employees from diverse backgrounds to serve the populations within the community the business is based in; doing more outreach to make others feel welcome and safe. This is truly necessary, and only the beginning. I really appreciate the AMGA working with our community to create this course, but there is still a lot of work to be done.

During the height of the pandemic, I made the tough decision to close my business, Permagumby, and refocus the way I show up in climbing. I’ve recently become much more vulnerable and visible as a nonbinary climber, as well as a trauma and sexual assault survivor. By sharing my identity and experiences, I’ve come to realize that there are so many folks like myself who have embraced climbing as a form of healing, meditation, and stability.

By creating my own programming I hope to build new and inclusive avenues toward mentorship and instruction, with both the client and guide in mind.

Once I receive my SPI certification, I will be able to operate as a instructor and can start making moves toward creating my own guiding service and collaborating with other queer folks and survivors to start programming specially designed for our communities.

In order to create new pathways in the outdoor industry it is imperative that we can dream together and envision futures defined by equity, inclusivity, and empowerment.

At the beginning of the course we introduced ourselves with our pronouns. Someone pointed out that there were more folks with they/them pronouns than not—and wow, what an amazing moment! I have never experienced that within any affinity group before, and it brought tears to my eyes.

We are here and there are so many of us within the climbing community. This physical representation of nonbinary-ness, of trans-ness, of queerness was absolutely beautiful and I was honored to be a part of it.

Creating accessibility and affinity projects like the LGBTQIA2+ Single Pitch Instructor course gives me hope that progress is happening in the guiding industry. Affinity groups and organizations that embody excluded communities hold knowledge and perspectives that are integral to creating an equitable and sustainable future for outdoor enthusiasts everywhere. Collaboration is the only way forward and I’m stoked to see the progress that has been made so far, and am excitedly looking forward to the future. Together we can create the future we want to see in the outdoors!

Identity is a nebulous thing, something we constantly create and recreate in our lives but something that is deeply reflective of our individual personhoods. This sanctuary of self-discovery happens over a lifetime but is caught and held in moments where we seek intentional transformational opportunities and are supported in our growth.

I have been interested, in my professional life, in the creation of transformational space, particularly in the outdoors. In the last decade, I have worked to create a culture of inclusion and celebration of diversity and identity in conservation work. These spaces that have traditionally been dominated and steered by the voices, needs and desires of a singular group are now themselves undergoing transformational change.

In my work in collaboration with Eastern Sierra Conservation Corps and directly with the California Conservation Corps Foundation, we are creating programming in a way that centers JEDI (justice, equity, diversity and inclusion) work. We believe that genuine access and inclusion is a driver of diversity and equity and culturally and individually informed support is a means of sustainable social and environmental justice engagement.

For years I have been hoping to include climbing as an element of our programming. Hiring a certified climbing instructor has always felt like a financial impossibility and becoming a certified climbing instructor myself was not even a whisper of a dream, until now.

I knew going into the course that I didn’t quite have the same level of experience as many of the other candidates. My resources have been limited as to how far I could push myself and experience climbing. I have never been in a position where I could spend the money to get all of the gear and necessary training to gain higher level skills. I had also never seen a path forward for people like me. I didn’t know any queer climbers who were out and celebrated. I didn’t have any models of representational leadership that were supported in the space of professional climbing. Until now.

There is a compounding effect to this kind of impact that reaches beyond individuals into their communities. Not only will this certification further enrich my life and professional career, it will have direct implications in the lives of the youth we engage as they gain the skills and confidence to become the next leaders in the outdoors, and consequently, in the lives of youth they serve through their leadership.